You’re the Pain that I Enjoy


You are the pain that lingers within my bones,

You are the blood that flows in my flesh.

Like an unsaid musing, or incomplete poem,

You are the conflicts in my head that often clash.


The baffling mystery which I seek to solve,

The murky treasure that give me a thrill.

Like stormy winds which starkly revolve,

Or like a peaceful lake which remains still.


You’re the secret which I can’t unfold,

Enchanting, delightful and the bold.

The chemistry between us remains vague,

But the conflict can’t make the tie break.


The image of yours, I have in my head,

May not resemble with you as I said.

You will remain pretty and adorable,

Nothing can make you less desirable.


~ Umair R. ~

Image Source:


Mob of Self-Worshipers


I don’t fit in the society

that is clustered by,

the self- worshipers,

exposing their perishable selves,

to seek validation from the peers.

In return, praising them like,

trading the appreciation.


I pursue something more meaningful,

than the mere appearances,

Something that is substantial,

which makes you unique,

Your art, your individuality ,

making you distinctive ,

in the mob of similar beings.

~Umair R.~

Image Source:

Show Me Your Soul



Show me your scars
On the soul
That is not visible
by the naked eye

Show me your pain
You hide so well
beneath your smile
Show me the wounds
On your skin
That disappeared with
The passage of time
Which still bleed
In your writing

Open up your heart
And Tell me about

Your fear and insecurities
Share with me
Your haunting thoughts
That don’t let you sleep
Introduce me with
The monsters that reside
Inside your head
Show me your body
Every shattered piece
That has a story to tell
Unfold yourself
Layer by layer
I want to see
Your real self
Put off that mask
That you wear
In public
Tell me,
That you are not strong
As you appear
That you are empty from inside
And need to be filled
With care and affection
Admit it,
That you need me
Believe it,
You too deserve love.

~Umair R.~

Image Source:

Knocking at the Same door


Why do I go there


There’s nothing new for me

Why do I knock at the same door

Over and over again


It will not be opened for me

Nobody is there to greet me


Why does my heart build


Maybe to get disappointed

Over and over again

Each time,

In different ways..

By different people

I don’t know..

Whether I belong to that place

Whether it owe me anything

But also,

I don’t know..

Where do I belong to exactly,

To the place where

My ideal resides

Where my eyes see

Materialization of the dream

that I saw in my youth

where emotions and feelings

Blossom even in rough times

Where there is a support

And a shoulder to rely on

Where love is appreciated

Without any discrimination

Where I am free to express

What I feel


There is someone to listen

To my rants and grievances

Where I won’t be judged for

What I have experienced

Willingly or unwillingly

I don’t know..

Whether such place existed

In this physical world


My heart desire

To go to that place anyway,

By all means,

I will keep knocking at that door

Over and over again


Only silence & disappointment

Would greet me

Every time,

With more intensity

With more sincerity.

~Umair R.~

Image Source:

Cactus will Never Grow Grains


Why to knock at the door again?
Despite knowing it holds nothing
Except some more disappointment,
And unforgettable regrets..
Gifted by painful experiences,
Of mere self-worthlessness..
Leaving behind bleak deprivation.
Why to bear the shame again?
Why does reason fail to persuade
Cactus will never grow grains.
Imprudent hopes lead nowhere,
Only assemble to get hurt severe,
In different situations, by different people.
Blame their cruelty or curse your fate,
But why letting you to accept that?
Disgusting bruised esteem differently,
While succumb it to desires’ reins.
Do we enjoy the wretched addiction?
Pity selflessness and self-denial
The lingering pain of rejection,
Tempt to fill us with more emptiness.

~Umair R.~

Short Keys to Unlock Happiness

Happiness is not very expensive even in this era of social frustration. In most of the cases, we have to pay the cost of everything which we wish to bring in our acquisition. As they say, there is nothing like Free Lunch in this world. Similarly, Happiness has a cost too. But this cost is not paid in cash or through your credit card. You might be thinking about your new house in a posh area or your luxurious car or branded clothes which you recently bought for yourself, for which you have paid a handsome amount and feel so much happy about this asset. Is the material acquisition of goods enough to make a person happy and satisfied? NO. If goods could make you happy; then the elite women would not have to fix appointments with a psychiatrist for their mental peace.
There is no specific formula for happiness or inner peace. However, I figured out some common cognitive attributes which may be helpful in releasing depression and accelerate positivity in your thoughts.
Value Yourself: The first very important point which leads towards happiness is to value yourself. Don’t think that you are worthless creature. Allah (s.w.t) has created every living being with a purpose and none of His creation is useless. Start analyzing yourself by pointing out your strengths and solution for your weaknesses. Think about your achievements and feel good about them. With a low level of self esteem; you should not expect to live a happy life.
Your are Not Here to Please Everybody: Most of the times we do things to make others happy: our bosses, management, husband, wife, friend etc. I’m not asking you to annoy them but at least stop killing yourself to meet their expectations. You are a Human who has his own life, likes and dislikes, dreams. You should do things which make you happy and of course which do not deviate from your code of ethics and moral standards. If an evening walk makes your mind fresh then go for it; don’t wait for a friend to accompany you. If you feel like having an ice cream; don’t beg your brother or husband to get it for yourself. Make a wish list and start following.
Ignore the phrase “Log Kia Kahengay” : Usually before doing something of our interest, the first phrase which strikes our mind or mom says is “Log Kia Kahengay” (what would people say). Just remember people are here to talk. They would comment or rather criticize even on your positive behavior. So just ignore them and judge your actions on your own parameters. You are intelligent enough to weigh the impact of your action on you and others. If something, according to you, is fine then its fine.
Worries about materialistic acquisition: Today, we live in a capitalist world where the purpose of living is to make as much money as we could in order to consume ‘Everything’ which others have. Being Muslims, its our faith to believe in the power of Almighty Allah. I heard a very deep thought sentence from a friend that “Naseeb se ziada aur waqt se pehlay kisi ko kuch nahi milta” (You cannot get more than your destiny and before time). It is not in our hands but to work hard with honestly, is surely within our reach. So we should play our part and leave rest to Him who plans better than us.
Praise people who deserve: Sharing happiness of others inculcates positivity in our thought and attitude. If your friend gets a position in exam; you must congratulate him on his success and share his happiness. Similarly, your colleague who gets a promotion deserves your honest wishes on his achievement. Be the part of your closed ones on the occasion of happiness and grief. This will make your heart kind and tender and you would start taking things positively.

Relationships for the Sake of …..?


Changing Relationships

Just ended up watching Bollywood new release, “I, Me aur Main” it was a simple triangular love story of break up between a unwed couple and both guy and girl find new partners and things moved on. Soon after first breakup, the girl gets pregnant and chooses to deliver the child even if its father doesn’t take responsibility. Well, then there’s typical Indian masala goes on.. What enticed my interest was the climax of the movie. I was not surprised to see the guy (hero) decides for a patch up with ex-girlfriend because he was emotionally touched by his mom’s words. Instead, the decision of girl (heroine) was quite interesting. She was of opinion that if they could continue to live together just for the sake of baby then their differences will remain the same and chances are there it would end up as divorce. She doesn’t wants to give a stressful family to her baby, therefore let her ex and father of her child, go and marry the woman he loves. At the end, it was shown that both of the parents are raising the child and spending time with her separately and his new girl friend happily accepts the baby.

Well that’s cute. But I was thinking if it could actually happen in real life? Can woman lets father of her child go to someone else happily? Can both parents take care of a child while being with their new spouses? Can new spouses accept the child?

Are our values actually changing to this extend? or such stories are seen on big screen only. What we see in reality, is most of the parents live together just for the sake of children, they don’t opt to separate because of social pressure. They sacrifice their happiness to look as a happy family. Is the scene changing with modernity? Time will witness that.